Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
I just got carded by a ten year old.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
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