so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
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