MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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