What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
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