Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
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