I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize