I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
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