Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
Randomize
