no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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