You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
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I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
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I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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