Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Randomize
