I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize