she peed on how many people?
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Randomize
