Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
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