belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Randomize
