So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Randomize