That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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