just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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