No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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