So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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