no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize
