a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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