I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
