All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
he just fucked me for my cheese.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
