I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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