At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
