the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
