I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
that's an acceptable place to lick
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Randomize
