dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
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