She's JV to your varsity
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
Randomize
