there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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