Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Randomize
