Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
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