Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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