I think I am morally bankrupt
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Randomize
