Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
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