i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
