lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
Tumblr User Tells Story About A ‘Demon Gets Adopted By A Grandma’& It Needs To Be A F**king Movie
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
20+ Kids Who Probably Didn’t Mean To Draw Hardcore Porn
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
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