her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
