You just made me feel so damn special
sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
