no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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