Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Randomize
