You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize