Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
