ya dads aren't the best wingmen
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
