So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
