my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
17 Exes Admit Why They Were Crazy In Their Past Relationship
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
These 25 Teachers Said Horrible Things to Their Students
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night