Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize