found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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