Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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