i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
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