I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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